My husband is going to kill me if he ever reads this post. But since having that happen is as miraculous as the Second Coming, I think I'm pretty damn safe.
Yesterday was a good day. Despite the fact in the past two days not only has one of my editors quit on me again, (I swear it's nothing I'm doing but I have gone through 4 editors at two different publishers), but one of my publishers has decided to pull most of their print books and concentrate mainly on ebooks.
This is not a problem for me really. I found the silver lining there, and actually dig the idea that the print rights will revert to me. I'll be in control of the printing, the cover, the distribution...everything. (I'm kind of a control freak, so this really spoke to my inner alpha bossy-girl). I was mildly disappointed because now I'll have to deal with the bs of printing, but it's not like I haven't looked into it several times over the years when I was pre-published. I just have to refind all the information. Well, enough said on that, I did mention it was a good day. The reason being, I got my very first, official royalty check. It wasn't for a good deal, but it was enough that I could put the money back into use and buy prizes for a contest I ran before going to RT. That was before I went to the bank to cash it.
I think you'll know the rest of the story without me even saying it. But yes, for the first time in 15 years, we were overdrawn on the account. What??!!! Say it isn't so! The rest of the day, I've been scrambling about, transferring money from this account to that account to cover the deficeit, and hoping to God the government hastens the cutting of my tax refund checks. Hubby is so upset...(He swears we were all right) that he had me tell them we are going to close the account. (He wasn't with me, but I called him on the cell phone when I found out.) Well, that's all well and good. We never had trouble with our bank through three different buyouts -or is it four- until the current owner (yes, a major, major bank) bought them, and now we've had nothing but trouble since. Anyhoo...the next two weeks are going to be very interesting. We both just filled up our cars, so we have enough gas. Dave got a few groceries yesterday, so we aren't likely to starve. (I could stand to lose a few pounds anyhow, so this might be good.)
I work very hard for my money...so hard for it honey. (Sorry, couldn't resist) Not only in my full time job, but at writing that having something like this happen when we are so careful with expenses, (hubby is in school full time right now so only working part time), is really a humiliating kick in the teeth.
I had an entire list of things I had to do today, and buy with that check. None of which are going to get bought, because I'm afraid to put anything on my credit card right now....just in case. Things will work out...they always do. I'll get a paycheck next week and hubby gets paid tonight or tomorrow...but it's just knowing that we work so hard and still we're very poor. I have 7 contracts for books and novellas, most of which will not see publication until later 07 and early 08. That's no help for the immediate. My Red Sage titles were advanced, so I won't see any return on them for a long while. I have another ebook coming out in July, but heck...I won't see payment for that until August or Sept.
I need the Lottery Gods to smile on me just once. Even the NJ Cash Five will be appreciated. The thing is...I can't even afford to buy a ticket. Hahahahahhahahahaha.... It's a cruel world.
I have heard the term "struggling writer" but I always thought that meant the road to publication. I didn't think it meant "struggling to pay bills," "struggling to buy food," "struggling to make ends meet."
Thank God I don't have kids. If I did...this would be a whole other nightmare.